Don't shower — but do eat lots of pig knuckles and papaya fish soup
My first-born child is due tomorrow. He will be the first grandchild on both sides of the family. So perhaps it's not suprising that for months my partner and I have been bombarded with advice on pre-natal health, parenting approaches, diapering, and all the stuff to buy. But what really caught me off guard was when my well-meaning mother recently warned me that my health would be forever compromised if during the month after the birth I left the house; took a shower; or failed to drink certain dishes, in particular one made with pigs knuckle, ginger, and eggs.
She explained that in many Chinese cultures the post-partum period is considered crucial for the mother to properly recover from the birth and elaborate rituals are followed. For the Cantonese, in particular, the choe yuet (坐月), or “resting month,” has profound effects on the mother’s health for the rest of her life.
This was all new to me. So my mother called my aunt in Hong Kong, who asked my cousin Danielle to e-mail me a list of the practices. She sent me a long list of what to do – and not do:
• Refrain from taking a shower or bath for a month. Use only water boiled with the skin of ginger to shower, if you really have to.
• Try not to shampoo your hair for the first week at least. Again use ginger water to shampoo if you really have to. Blow dry hair immediately.
• After giving birth, drink roasted rice water instead of plain water for several days.
• Drink the roasted rice tea or boiled water. Do not drink straight from the tap.
• Keep warm all the time.
Danielle also gave me a list of things to eat, and not eat. Here is a selection:
- • Eat a dish made from pig’s knuckle, ginger, sweet black vinegar, and eggs to aid the recovery. Cook the pig knuckle ginger vinegar (at least) one month before the arrival of the baby. (Keep the ginger skin for the shower. Dry the ginger skin and store in bags.)
- • Do NOT eat pig livers or pigeons, or drink soups made from these ingredients, as they will stop the production of milk.
- • Any kind of fish soups or papaya fish soup will help the production of the milk.
For the most part, the list left me quite overwhelmed (except for avoiding pig livers and pigeons). No showering for one month? Or leaving home? My mother also told me about the importance of drinking certain nutritional soups, which I, of course, did not know how to make.
It was difficult for me to figure out how much I should follow and respect these traditions passed on from my mother, or should I act more “American” and ignore the “traditional wisdom?” A Taiwanese friend of mine compromised with her mother and agreed not to leave the house for two weeks. But I was told that Danielle’s sister Cressida in Hong Kong regrets not taking the period seriously and now is suffering from various health problems. Learning about the choe yuet was quite scary, particularly in my last month of pregnancy when I dealing with fear of how my life would change after the birth, and if I would regain the body I once knew.
Danielle, who has maintained her youth and vitality, hired a woman who specialized in post-partum care to help take care of her and her baby and prepare the specific foods important to recovery. Living in Alhambra where about a third of the population has Chinese ancestry, I had a feeling there would be local resources about the postpartum period. I was right. I discovered three women, all working out of employment agencies, who offered services to help conduct these practices.
Finding their contacts was as far as I got. I realized that following choe yuet by the book wasn’t for me. I couldn’t do all the practices – and, despite Cressida’s experiences – didn’t believe I needed to. After all, access to nutritional food and modern amenities such as running hot water that most likely were not available when these customs were established. I will be open-minded and do what I can from the list, but not follow it blindly. And the pig knuckle in ginger vinegar is waiting in the fridge.